Dear Lee,

Those of us who were born with the collecting gene are always surprised when fellow collectors decide to sell their collections. How can they part with the results of years of searching and study, and how can they live without the things that trigger their favorite memories?

So why do people sell their treasured antiques? The mantra, according to a friend who owns an auction gallery, is “Death, Divorce, Debt or Downsizing.” The past few months have shown me how true this is. Ralph’s death led to the need to close his other office, and I was forced to sell or donate many things that I know he treasured. But what could I do with huge paintings and 42 cruets? The walls and shelves in our house are already filled. And his office was filled with his treasures, not mine. Mine and ours are in our home. I did ask our children and some friends if there were meaningful things they wanted. A few pictures and desk accessories became gifts.

Divorce definitely leads to selling collections. Friends tell me they not only want the money, but also want to get rid of the memories. I have been a “referee” in settlements in mean-spirited divorces: one party insists on selling an entire collection just to annoy the spouse who wanted to keep it.

Debt is a good reason to sell right now, while the economy is weak. I know many collectors who have had to part with a few things to keep up with their bills. And I know of several investors in the Ponzi scheme run by Bernie Madoff who had to sell part of expensive art collections to keep ownership of houses and cars or to pay college tuition.

But downsizing is becoming the main reason my friends are selling collections. There comes a time as you age when a smaller house or condo with no steps—preferably near a medical center—is a good idea. That decision leads collectors to sell or give away many unused and least-favored collectibles so there’s room for necessary furnishings.

If you’re selling, don’t feel sad. You have enjoyed collecting; now you’re helping to support yourself and delighting someone else. But don’t delude yourself into thinking someone will want ALL of your collection. Assembling it was your personal work, and part of the joy you took from it came from selecting each piece. Other collectors want to do the same thing. So ask friends and family if they want anything. Then sell or donate the rest and congratulate yourself on your talent for choosing valuable collectibles.

Kovels Item

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