Dear Lee,

A new study by your alma mater, The University of Denver, shows that married couples who play together stay together. The more you share fun and friendship, the happier your marriage will be. So don’t spend hours online or watching television. Instead, as collectors know, you should go to an antique show or house sale.

But what if the two of you want to collect different things? We decided long ago to agree to “his” and “her” purchases. Ralph likes advertising and oddities. Terry wants pottery and textiles. And at the end of a long day at a flea market, we come home, unpack and each admire all our treasures. We have been collecting since our honeymoon. You and your sister, when small, liked to find cans or bottles for Ralph under the dealers’ tables, and also managed to find things you wanted us to buy for you.

We enjoyed it all-the buys, the strange food, the out-of-the-way trips and each other. And the study is right: we played together and stayed together. And, if needed, we have a “savings account” in the form of antiques and collectibles we can eventually sell. A word of warning: sometimes the couple that doesn’t collect together fights about the other’s purchases.